Carol of the Bells

Hark, how the bells, sweet silver bells
All seem to say, throw cares away...

Throw cares away?? I just can't, not especially this very Christmas. So many things to finish. The thesis simulation application is not even half-finished. And considering that I'm doing the half of our group's thesis, I have just finished almost one-fourth of the entire thesis. I just hope that my other two groupmates are doing well.

And then there's still the schoolpaper layout, which I can't finish because of the lack of resources (articles, pictures, other important instructions), the Filipino-lifestyle-themed photography assignment for Humanities 101, and a freakin' PowerPoint presentation for Internet Technologies class. WAAAAA!!! Merry Christmas indeed!

Well, at least I'm enjoying programming the most important of them all, which is obviously the thesis, Chemical Bonding Tutorial and Simulation. As I've mentioned, I'm doing almost half of the system, which is the Simulation. I love OpenGL and my newfound programming language Visual Basic, designed for user-interface-oriented and lazy programmers like me. I just have to make sure that I'll not be too spoiled by VB.

What the hell am I still doing here?? I should be opening the VB workspace and work my ass off.

By the way, the following is my new favorite Christmas song, Thrice's revival of the "Carol of the Bells." It sounds mysterious and dark, which I like. Ironic for a Christmas song, huh? The video version I've found in YouTube shows Full Metal Alchemist clips. I like both the anime and the song, but they seem weird when they are together. There's not even something Christmasy in the video clips, except for the snow...

The Very Christmas to Me

:( Ateneo Fiesta Week will be officially over by the end of this day. I have to refill my academic vehicle's tank with academic fuel so I can drive it, bringing this academic burden without dropping it lest I fail to reach the finish line that is graduation. *sigh* But hey, it was the start of December just yesterday! It's the month of Christmas! We have actually decorated just last week.

But honestly, I have not been excited and eager for this coming Christmas and also for the other Christmases during the past few years. Even though I've been receiving some gifts during this season, it doesn't feel like the Christmases in my childhood. I can still remember those times nearing December when I constantly ask my mother if it was Christmas season already. I just couldn't wait then to bring out the Christmas tree and all the other ornaments from their 10-month storage above the bedroom closet and release them throughout the house so that the spirit of the Holidays would manifest. But the college Christmases were... blaahh... Perhaps it's because there are no forced Christmas parties anymore, with manito-manita. Yes, they may be forced, but a classic Christmas party is one thing that makes me feel it's really Christmas. Kris Kringles were exciting 'coz you get to collect clues for who picked your name, and you also get to think creatively such that your mark is concealed in your gifts.

*sigh* Those childhood and high school Christmases were quite different from the past few Decembers, which were also the times when our old Christmas decorations were deteriorating, actually. We were not supposed to decorate for Christmas this year because we realized that we don't invite Holiday visitors anymore anyway. So who else would marvel at the decorations but us? However, my sister in the States sent us money and insisted us to spend it on new decorations. So there we go - a new Christmas tree around six feet tall, and some Christmas balls and other ornaments to hang around it and around the house. We also recycled a few old decorations that still look decent. But... they didn't revive the Christmas spirit. Hmmm... maybe the decorations cannot find the spirit's remains anywhere in the house.

Therefore, I would just have to look for and revive it myself, and attempt to feel each Christmas as the "very first Christmas to me." Reminds me of the hilarious 'Christmas Who?' episode of Spongebob Squarepants. I like the musical number in it, which fortunately is available in YouTube and is embedded below.

I wonder at what exact age I discovered the very first Christmas to me. I hope I wasn't as overenthusiastic and naive as Spongebob was during his.

It's shaping up to be a wonderful holiday,
Not your normal, average everyday.
Sounds like someone killed my old coral tree.
Spongebob, Patrick, why'd you do this to me?
The world feels like it's in loverly.
Go away before I harm you bodily.
This Christmas feels like the very first Christmas to me.
There'll be shopping, decorating, and plenty of snow.
Hey, Patrick, who's that under the mistletoe?
What? Who, me? Would you look at the time, I should go!
People seem a little more brotherly.
Here's a little something to you from me.
Even all the trash on Christmas it smells so sweetly.
This Christmas feels like the very first Christmas to me.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la (x many times)
What do you want? Can't you see that I'm busy?
Step outside, we've got something for you to see.
Spongebob, take this stuff down immediately!
Chestnuts roasting and burned to the third degree.
Tonight things are as good as they seem to be.
A star on top will complete all the scenery.
This Christmas feels like the very first Christmas to me
This Christmas feels like the very first Christmas to me